27 Augustus 2012

Evening,

I have resigned from a well respected job to live out a few dreams or to become happy.  Today was my first day of freedom. although I was still pinned down and till 2pm.

The company refused to pay my last salary they owed me and since Friday I had to fight for it.  It gave me anxiety attacks and a huge amount of stress.  I could kiss my financial advisor, because se gave me an email that I had to pass on and an hour or a frustrating two, later, I received my salary.

I woke up this morning with a headache from hell.  I couldn’t lift my head.  It could’ve been because of yesterday’s crying or the lack of water the weekend.  It could be both?!  The headache unfortunetly lasted the entire day.  I popped a few vitamin pills, drank water and tea.

In the moments I felt myself, I baked cupcakes, especially for our neighbours that gave us brownies about 8 months ago.  I told her that the cupcakes were way over due, but she just smiled.  Her children kept asking why is the lady giving her cupcakes.  They were on the other side of the wall and couldn’t see me, she stood on her toes and could barely see me.  I love this kind of neighbouring gestures.  Handing goodies over the wall.  She seems like a wonderful person.  I would love to see more of her. 

Then again, most people I meet, I would love to see again, but alas.

I have found a type of relieve after receiving my salary, but total freedom is not resting in me yet.  I am sure the company would phone me soon to ask me to help them out.  I am not up for a struggle anymore.

I can feel my ankles taking a punishment after all the workout it received today.  Partly because I am used to sit for 9 hours a day and partly because I am overweight.

The lady that I am going to work for referred me to another lady.  It is great, since I haven’t even worked for the first lady yet.  I will now together with the Au-Pairing, drive an elderly lady to the hospital and make sure she receives her medicine.  She needs wheelchair assistance.  I am looking forward to that!

I will have to make lists of goals I would like to adchieve each day, otherwise the days are going to go by and I will not grow or reach my dreams. 

I am almost happy and at peace, but still a bit uncertain.

Sleep tight.

xxx 

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